I don’t really keep plants. I tend to ‘over love’ them and kill them. Accidentally of course, but they fair better when I purposefully ignore them. I was thrilled when my succulent dropped a couple of leaves and I managed to create whole new plants from them. Then I got excited, paid them too much attention, over watered them and now the big one looks like it might lose a few more leaves again but hopefully it’ll pull through.
That’s the great thing about people. You can’t love someone too much. You can love them just as much as you want, and they don’t have to participate in that at all. Even if you’re not speaking, you are free to love them in your heart, unconditionally, without needing or expecting anything in return.
It took me a really long time to learn how to do this, and I still slip up and notice myself getting annoyed or hurt sometimes when I let some sort of expectation creep in, but I can whole-heartedly say, it is worth the practice.
Loving someone without expectation feels SO much better than not. You get to love someone regardless of the circumstances, and heal and grow in the meantime. It’s so freeing, and allows you to feel better, without needing them to do anything.