The Blog

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Promises

Promises

What can we hope for, except truth? There is little chance of promises being kept, unless they are promises of change, for we can no more tell if we will always be kind than if the sun will warm our faces that day. Because really, isn’t that all we truly want to know? Will you be kind to me? Will you treat me well? Is my heart safe with you?
And of course, we can never know, because we are all imperfect and the chances are we will forget to be kind one day, and someone will choose to blame our momentary lack of integrity on a fundamental character flaw, destined to be repeated and therefore requiring us to be written off or punished with distance…. Or perhaps, they will instead recognise our imperfections as their opportunities to heal….and allow us both the opportunity for radical honesty and transparency, rather than promises we can only ever hope to keep. Perhaps even, that we will trust ourselves to hold our hearts safely, and that when we open those hearts to others it is done so with the knowledge that whatever happens, our hearts will always be safe, because we put our faith in love, not an imperfect interpretation of who someone else should be

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We’re all one

We’re all one

“If it’s the highest and best for anyone, it’s the highest and best for everyone, because we’re all one.” @jenniferhelenhadley

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Love does not do

Love does not do

Love does not “do”, it simply “is”.

Love does not have to prove itself, nor behave a certain way to exist. It is our very essence. It is always kind, and always peaceful. It is our state of being when all our fear, judgement and thoughts of lack and attack are removed. It does not need action to sustain it. .
In love, all things sustained

Photo taken at: Cornwall

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My happy place

My happy place

Maybe my happy place is here, and maybe it’s a world within me, where I realise and truly believe that I am loved, and loveable, and loving: where I can believe once again in integrity and kindness and where I can choose every day to live and breathe these qualities and have them reflected back to me in the community I find myself in. Kindness breeds kindness. Choose to behave accordingly

Photo taken at: Cornwall

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On being…

On being…

Sometimes (always), it wasn’t about wrong or right, and it wasn’t about making something be true when maybe it wasn’t, it was just about being: recognising that without the judgement – the constant need to make sense of things, make meaning of things….there was nothing left to fight, and there she found her peace.

And that peace pervaded everything if she let it. If she finally surrendered her desire to control, her fear that giving up what she thought she wanted would lead her to miss out on something meant for her, instead of gaining what she didn’t know she really wanted all along.

There is method in the madness. There is serenity in the surrender. There is peace in the perfectness. Could she cultivate a little more faith in this?

Photo taken at: Cornwall

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I may not be who you want me to be

I may not be who you want me to be

I may not be who you want me to be, and I’ve definitely done the wrong things at the wrong time for the wrong reasons. Some may think it’s arrogant to forgive myself for things I’ve done which have hurt others, but if we cannot move past the pain and resentment of the past, we have no chance at finding peace in the present, and I choose peace. It doesn’t help you to have me relive my past and my guilt. We don’t need more hate in the world, we need more love.

A funny thing happens when you let the past go: you fall into a deeper integrity with yourself. You are able to make better choices because your ego isn’t keeping you focusing on who you were and what sort of person you ‘should’ be. Instead, you can just focus on what feels peaceful, and what feels kind. There’s no conflict between what I want and what you want: I’m pretty certain we both want a kinder and more loving space to exist

Photo taken at: New Polzeath

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Forgiveness and healing

Forgiveness and healing

And so she wandered, though the space in her own mind, and realised, perhaps for the first time, that all the pain she’d suffered, seemingly at the hands of others, she inflicted upon herself: to remember, to hold sacred, and to continue to use to torture herself, long after the dream ended. And so she resisted the change: the healing, because it had been so easy. After years of trying, and fighting with herself, she realised that the truth was there right in front of her the whole time, and all she had to do was look behind the wall she’d built through her own fear, and accept it. Somehow, it seemed it had been better to continue to fight, to reaffirm her rightness and justify her judgements, than to admit that she had been wrong all along, and it really didn’t matter what had happened in the past. To find true peace, it only required one thing: forgiveness. And the moment she relinquished the need to be right, to keep score and store the points she’d supposedly won for being the ‘bigger person’, healing flooded through her, and she recognised that the peace she had so longed for, had been with her all along

Photo taken at: New Polzeath

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