It’s not good enough to say I love you, but not act like you do.
Sometimes the greatest acts of kindness are the ones we show ourselves, or the ones that don’t look like kindness on the outside.
Let’s stop enabling and start supporting: no longer saying “it’s ok, you’re hurting, you can do what you want”, and instead create some boundaries which say, “I love you, but it’s not ok for you to treat me like this. So I’ll be here and love you whilst you do your thing, but I also need you to own your shit and look for a way through”. Or “I love you but I need to step away until you’re ready for me to love you”. Too many of my friends and clients are struggling to walk the line between showing they care and being walked all over right now. I’ve struggled with the same thing most of my life.
We need to know the difference between enabling more of the same, and powerfully supporting the person we care about to feel whatever it is they need to feel and move forward.
We can’t expect others to love us unless we know how to love and support ourselves.
And “We can’t love another until we are able to love ourselves” (wise words from a wise friend). This is the work. Love ourselves first. Then we will know how to love others. 📸 @loveluella