It should be classed as a disease, but unfortunately it’s not. Instead it’s a symptom in some of the most common issues we face today: depression, anxiety, stress and self-sabotage.
Emotional numbness is simply not feeling.
Not feeling happy, nor sad, not getting excited when you know you should. It’s knowing intellectually how you should feel, but not being able to get there emotionally. Sometimes, anxiety, depression or anger creeps in instead in a vague attempt to feel anything, rather than the void of numbness.
My work as your coach, counsellor, mentor, or whatever else you choose to call me, coaxes you out of living your life through other peoples’ expectations and helps you rediscover what it means to be you.
By lovingly reclaiming ourselves, we open up and share the very best of ourselves with those we love, and consequently inspire them to do the same.
It’s a movement. It’s changing the world one person at a time.
And I can’t wait to share it with you.
Over the years I’ve felt just about every emotion under the sun.
I’ve also spent a huge amount of time feeling nothing at all. Social anxiety hit when I went to college, following a short-lived but damaging abusive relationship and a very controlled childhood. I’d have panic attacks before lectures and dreaded leaving my room. Fortunately, I found a great therapist and was able to start yoga classes by my second year.
I loved yoga and the lack of judgment, of myself and from others, that came with it.
All that mattered was the awareness of body and breath.
Yoga became a constant in my life, until my confidence and control issues got the better of me again and I succumbed to an eating disorder which controlled my life for two years. I starved and binged my body until I didn’t know which way was up and every waking moment was consumed by thoughts of food and calories and weight. I was so desperately unhappy without even realizing it and that need to feel something and be in control of something came out in my inability to look after my body and eat healthily.
During that time I was too weak to do yoga,
so instead I got on my mat and practiced meditation.
I read all I could and found a stillness and quiet that rarely made an appearance at any other time, and I believe that this, and the support of my wonderful mum and dad are what gave me the strength to go back to therapy and kick my eating disorder and control issues once and for all. In 2009, I decided to deepen my knowledge of yoga and completed my 250 hour Yoga Teacher Training with the renowned Conrad Paul, in London.
It shifted my perspective on the world and what we,
as human beings are capable of doing and feeling.
Soon after, I left the family business (which I joined straight from university after earning my BA (hons) in Human Resource Management and Membership to the Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development) and set myself up in London. I got a job as a reception manager, quickly getting a reputation for being able to turn around problematic teams and coaching them into being the best versions of themselves. This lead to a speedy promotion to Senior Management with the UK’s leading Reception Management company and a job I loved, working with a team who made me laugh and beam with pride every day.
Despite this success and feeling pretty happy with myself and what I’d accomplished, there was always a gaping hole in my heart.
I followed my intuition and signed up for my Advanced Diploma in Psychotherapeutic Counselling. It took four years and a clinical placement in the bereavement service at the Royal London Hospital…and was worth every ounce of effort I put in to it.
Right now, I’m getting to be ‘me’.
Exactly who I am, with no apologies. Believe me when I tell you there is no other better feeling. Allowing the real me to come out has shown me just how much more I have to offer the world when I’m being authentic.
I am so grateful to be able to share what I’ve learned with you and help spread the message of loving compassion.
I’m sure by now you’ve decided if we could be best friends or at least whether I ‘get’ you. If that’s a yes, click here to find out more about working with me!